


Alone

by studlinson



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-04
Updated: 2015-03-04
Packaged: 2018-03-16 09:11:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3482630
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/studlinson/pseuds/studlinson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry Styles, the boy in school who everyone pities.<br/>He walks around avoiding all the looks.<br/>Then a new boy comes, his names Louis Tomlinson, but Harry doesn't know that yet.<br/>When he comes from Doncaster does everything change?<br/>Or does everything get worse.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Intro

**Author's Note:**

> First of all I would like to thank one of my old best friends for writing a song because this book is based off the begging and end of her song. Second I'm gonna be updating slowly because I have basketball practice. But I'll update whenever I can. All of my chapters will have 1,000 or more words in them. But this is the intro so it's gonna have a little less. Okay here goes nothing.

I feel someone shaking me slightly trying to wake me up. I start to twist and turn in my bed, trying to get away from the hand shaking me back and forth. After a while since the shaking didn't work they start to whisper at me. "Harry, wake up you have to go to school." I hear my mums quiet voice ring through my ears. I frown. Not at my mums voice just the fact that I have to go to school. It's not because I don't like learning I just get lonely sometimes. I don't have friends. Well not anymore I don't. Not since that horrible day. I hate talking about it and right after it happened I didn't talk to anyone. " Harry baby boy I know you don't wanna go but you have to." she says a little louder.

I sigh. "Okay, I'll get up." she kisses my forehead and ruffles up my hair then leaves my room.

I sigh and stand from my bed. I start to undress myself from my pajama pants and my t shirt. I look at myself and frown a little. I look at the bruise on my hip I got last night from bumping into my bed after I went to the bathroom. I push on it a little and wince. I then look at my big toe and see that it's a dark red color from me stubbing my toe again last night the same time I hit my hip. I'm pretty clumsy, but I have no clue why.

I start getting into my tight pants and almost fall over twice, but I catch myself with my hand. I quickly pull on a random shirt and grab my bag and walk down stairs.

"Carry me down stairs please?" my older sister says in her best pleading voice.

"Yeah, okay." I nod. I start to squat down a little bit to her height and she jumps on my back.

She leans her head softly on my shoulder and I start walking down stairs. Once I get close enough I see that mum is cooking for us. I get to the living room and gently lay Gemma on the couch. She mumbles a small thanks and lays her head down. I walk up to my mum and give her a kiss on her cheek.

"Morning baby boy. How was your sleep?" she asks giving me a short smile then going back to her cooking.

"It was a good long one." I reply not putting that much detail into it.

She nods. " Can you get out the plates for me?"

I nod and walk to the cabinet to grab the plates. I set the plates on the counter and go in the living room to get Gemma. I pick her up and sit her at the kitchen table. She groans and looks at her surroundings. Once her eyes land on her plate her face instantly lights up and she starts to dig in her eyes loose a little light and she slouches. My mum looks at her, but I just look down at my plate and start to eat. Everyone is quiet so I decide to compliment my mums cooking.

"Mum this pancakes are really good." I smile at her.

She smiles. "Thanks Har-"

"Yeah they're good, but they aren't Harry's pancakes." I hear Gemma mumble.

Mum sighs. I look down at my plate again, then quickly glance at Gemma and see she has her head down poking at her food.

Everyone gets silent after that.

*****************************************

After I say bye to mum and Gemma I walk outside to my car. I'm a senior in high school so I can drive. I get in and start the drive to school. I turn on the radio and my favorite band The Script starts playing. I turn up the radio and hum along to their song Break Even. Once I get to school I notice I'm a little earlier than usual so I sit in my car and wait.

While I'm waiting I see Zayn, Niall, Liam, and - Wait who's that? I try to look at him a little better, but I can only see the side of his face. Then Niall points over to my car and he looks straight at me. Even though he's standing far away from me I can still see his beautiful blue eyes. After a while he turns away again. Everyone starts to head inside. When I see everyone's gone I get out of my car. I walk up to the doors no one hardly uses and walk inside them. Even though the doors are far away from my classes it stalls me from getting pitied stares.

I really hope today's a good day.

***-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-***

O MY LORD I HOPE YOU GUYS ARE SURPRISED BC I MEAN WOW. ILY MY LOVELY UNICORNS.

-Lana


	2. Joy

Joy. That's all I saw. Joy dancing around the hallways of Endale High School. (an: completely made that up.) I only felt genuine joy once or twice every two weeks, but other people joy comes naturally for them. Of course there were those few little petty dramas going around and tiny arguments, but the joy stood out most. The only reason it stood out is because every time I would walk by someone they would become silent and give me a pitied look. God I hate when they do that. It's three years! I'm completely fine and I don't need anyone's pity dragging me back down into the pit of grief. I sigh and breath in deeply.

No need to get heated up, little Harry

I quickly started to chew on my thumb trying to get that nickname out of my head.

Little Harry

It hurt so much. It just hurt so damn much for no reason! This was three years ago. Three years and I'm still sad over the same thing. I'm supposed to be moving on. Life is supposed to get better. Isn't that what everyone said?

Instead of bringing worse thoughts into my head I walked to my locker and quickly grab all the stuff I need and start my way to class. On the way to class I saw Niall, Liam, and Zayn. The boy I saw earlier wasn't with them. I wonder where he is. I just shrug and quietly walk to my first class which is math.

I walk into the classroom and the first person I see is my old friend Nichole. I quickly look down before I could look at her look of disappointment. She's the only person that doesn't look at me with pity, but honestly I would tak pity other than disappointment. I do hate both though.

I walk to the very back of the class and sit there. The teacher I don't even know her name starts to call out attendance. My teacher I'm pretty sure she's a good teacher, but honestly I just go home later and I ask my mom for help since she is a college math teacher. She also classifies in science, and history. Unfortunately she doesn't like English so I have to actually pay attention in that class.

"Harry Styles?" the teacher calls.

Everyone's heads turn toward me and I sigh and raise my hand.

The teacher sighs and puts a hand on her hip. "Harry we talk about this every day I need an audible response." she says politely.

I clear my throat and quietly mumble "Here."

She too gives me a pitied smile and goes back to calling out the names.

I look down at my pants and pick at them. I do that for the rest of the class.

**************************************************

I walk into the lunch room and see more smiling faces. Everytime I walk past a group of people they all get quiet and stare at me with those pitied looks I hate. I start to walk by my old group of friends which consists of Ed, Niall, Liam, Zayn, and Nichole. Then there's that new kid sitting there too. I walk past them and instead of getting pitied look it's much worse. Each one at a time looks at me with a disappointed face then turns and the next does it and so on. But when it gets to that new kid I still don't know the name of he doesn't look at me with disappointment. He looks at me with curiousity and determination. Honestly I don't know why, but I do know it makes me feel better. It makes me happy that I don't make everyone sad or disappointed.

I walk up to the lunch counter and order the food I want. The lunch lady even gives me a pitied look when she's done giving me my food. I sigh and walk away. I start to head my way on the footie field. Once I get to the bleachers I sit down right underneath then and start to eat. After I'm finished I look up at the sky and stare at the beautiful gray skies of London. Sure it's not sunny and happy, but it makes me happy. It helps me by letting me know that I'm not the only one hurting in this world and also that some people even have it worse. Sure it's a harsh way to feel better, but hey it helps.

I start to hum a random tune, and begin to smile at the thought of writing another song. Usualy I write songs about the sky and things around me, but I don't know not I feel like it's the time to write a song about me.

I start to scribble down the lyrics.

There's a boy. Who sits under the bleachers. Just another day eating alone.

***************************************************************************

School is finally over so I quickly leave the classroom to my car and jump in. I get home quickly and walk into the house. As soon as I get in I see Gemma sitting on the couch watching a romance movie, with a tub of chocolate, and a box of tissues. She looks at me and I look at her. We both just stare at each other for a while until I put down my book bag and walk over to the couch. For a while I just look at her. All cuddled up on the couch with a big spoon inside her mouth with tear tracks on her cheeks. She just turns back to the TV and slouches. I pick up the tissue box and then sit back down and set the tissues box on my lap.

For a while we're both silent. I look at the TV and notice she's watching The Fault In Our Stars. Honestly I've read the book and seen the movie so much I don't even cry anymore. It's at the part where they're at Peters house - he was an asshole - and Agustus is getting angry. When I watched that part I started giggling because he looks funny when he's "mad".

I turn to Gemma. "What happened?"

She sniffles. "Eric."

Eric is Gemma's boyfriend, or at least yesterday he was I don't know about today. I don't know if he's a nice person or not because I can't tell if he's joking or not. There was this one time he called me a fag.

_***Flashback*** _

_"Harry your jeans are so tight dude! I don't know how you do it. Is it cutting off curculation?" he starts to laugh._

_I chuckle and shake my head. My mom smiles at the two of getting along._

_"I mean only a fag wears those so I guess that's what you are right?" He starts to laugh again._

_My moms smile instantly drops off her face and I sort of just stand there uncomfortablely._

_"Eric! You apologize right now! I don't care if you are my daughters boyfriend no one talks to my child like that!" Mom says obviously angry._

_***End of Flashback*** _

I never did get my apology.

"What about Eric?" I ask quietly.

She starts to whimper "He -" she clears her throat. "He broke up with me." her voice breaks off at the end. I feel horrible because I never want to see someone I care for cry. It makes me want to destroy anything that made them stop smiling.

I clench my fist. "Do you know why?" I ask calmly.

She shakes her head rapidly. "I don't know. Harry can you just hug me and feel sorry for me please?"

I open my arms and she falls right into them and starts to sob. My eyes start to tear up. Not only because she's crying, but because we haven't been this close in three years. Three. That's when it hit me. It hit me like a hurricane. I just realized how much I missed my sister. I missed her so much and it feels good to have her back.

It's now that I realize why I'm not joyful. It's because I don't allow myself to try to be joyful. I'm so caught up in my sadness I'm not even trying. Now that I'm so deep in I need help getting out. Getting out of this hole of grief that has been with me for three years. It won't be easy, but I sure as hell will try my best, because My family have missed me. My family needs me. I've cause most of my family's pain and it's time for me to bring the pain away.


End file.
